bLACK Friday

As this year’s bLACK Friday “Early Access” Sale messages and notifications on all mediums start showing up I am staying aware and alert, watching…

What a year this has been. Unprecedented and in many more ways than one for me.
I cannot even imagine it’s been almost a year already since I took a leap of sorts this time to dive deeper into a new way of being.
I made a conscious choice to step out of the “consumer mindset” and committed to practicing a simpler way of life as I was called to do for a long time.

You see I love beautiful things. Even more so when they are handmade, designed by someone I know/love, when it’s created with intention and care and are part of a larger cultural story or heritage.
It’s no surprise then as for us who see and find beauty in life that we often find so many things beautiful that we are tempted to buy them.
It’s our way of treasuring and appreciating them one may say.

Last year as I sat to declutter my energetic space for the work I desire to do, I found myself at crossroads that offered me a choice.
To choose a new way of living and being with things.
Amidst the piles of clothes, shoes, bags I was sorting the question popped up again.
“In order to appreciate beautiful things is it necessary for me to own them?” Before I could even consciously answer, pat came the answer perhaps from my subconscious.
“If I choose this new way, will I be able to really follow through on it in the long term?

“All serious daring starts from within” — Eudora Welty

Temptation is a deadly mistress of seduction.
But only to those who are unaware.
Almost a year has gone by and I am quite thrilled to see how staying aware and present has helped me shine a light on many of my untrue beliefs of conditioning I subconsciously carried within.
I have not shopped for any nonessentials this year.
The best part is that not only have I not missed a thing, but I have also found so much joy along the way!
First, let me clarify that there’s no judgment here on anyone who chooses to shop or buy items.
This is not a black and white statement.
We all have our legitimate, unique needs, desires and what we define as essential or otherwise.

What is fulfilling versus what is an extravagance is something only we hold the sovereign right to decide for ourselves.

In fact, I recently picked up this beautiful tea strainer from a local business.
My old tea strainer was broken and I needed one.
I could have easily got a cheaper and simpler one but chose to pick this up from a local business by paying a higher price because it simply felt right on so many levels.
Every night as I pick it up to strain my herbal tea, it never fails to bring a smile to my face.
When we navigate through life within our values, we naturally value what we receive.

OUR TRUE SELF and BUYING HABITS

Well now, what does True Self have to do with this you ask? :)
Everything.
A journey of living an intentional meaningful life begins by taking a radically honest look at one’s own self-identity first.
When we connect to our True Self, we are able to clearly see where and in which areas we function from a space of separation versus oneness.
When we move through our lives in the identity of our separate selves, we operate, relate, and live as the Ego.
The Ego’s ways are clearly different…

• It grasps and is driven by its deep subconscious everpresent desires.

• Instant gratification is its mode.

• It finds happiness in owning things.

• It is synonymous with a bottomless desire for MORE. It WANTS with desperation and will justify its wants to pursue it.

• It thrives on feeling accomplished. Especially in this context when it comes to procuring a “great” deal or bargain.

• Lack — subtle or obvious — is its eternal state.

• Personal gain is its underlying agenda — subtle or obvious.

The Ego is a healthy and useful construct until you, unaware of its role and functionality start identifying with it and then move through life translating the separateness you feel as a truth of lack or scarcity.
In recognizing and being seated in awareness, we hold the possibility to untangle ourselves from this way of being by clearly seeing what parts of us continue to be tethered to this ever-hungry self.

The very nature of who we are is FULLNESS and therefore when we move through life from this recognition, we naturally move from sufficiency and not to fill a nonexisting illusion.

THE PATHWAY OF SIMPLICITY

There is no one particular way or path to explore or begin this.
As with everything there is only your unique way.
All my new paths start when I ask myself these two essential questions with radical honesty.
1. Who am I being as I move, love, live, and lead my life?
2. What part is my self playing in sustaining the current way of being and living that I witness in the world.

Below I share a few additional guidelines I used in this process that have helped me immensely.

• Start your day by anchoring to your True Self. Realize your inherent “isness” which is fullness.
  We are complete and enough in all moments. Yes, even when and especially when we may not be feeling so.

• Start small. You don’t need to change everything at once.

• Ask yourself
  - Where in my life do I own things that are more than what I really need?
  - Where do I spend time managing things more than I need to?
  - What overwhelms me?
  These could be things such as clothes, kitchen gadgets, or even things such as online courses, work, and information.

• Decide which ONE area needs attention, to begin with, and commit to it.

• Write down all the reasons this decision feels right and wonderful for you.

• Keep awareness alarms throughout the day as you feel fit. It is very natural as we start a new practice that we fall into our old habitual patterns soon enough. The alarms help us center and become more mindful as we walk this path with compassion.

• Expect temptation to show up.
  She is your divine teacher. She will show up in many disguises.
  Watch how and where your sense of lack is being called forth by the players of the world who create an impression of exclusivity with the use of brands, waitlists, limited supply, and FOMO targeting time limits to rush you into buying. Even well-meaning people do this because they believe the end justifies the means.
  Look deeper and be mindful about who and what you choose to trust. Bless and thank it all as they are perfectly playing their part in your journey. If not for them, you would never know what triggers exist hidden within you.

• Dig deeper. Before you buy check within and ask “What do I really need right now? “ For me, it almost always leads me right to the need of a being state. Love, ease, joy, comfort…

• If you get struck by any particular “shiny object”. Remind yourself not to rush into it. Give yourself the gift of time.
  Sleep on it and see how you feel the next day.
  FYI -I take a week. Or sometimes two. :D

• Know that if it really is something that you need then you will remember it again as you encounter a practical need. If the feeling passes, it was just a flash in the pan.

MY 2 FAVORITE TIPS

1. Barter/Exchange/Borrow — This is how I grew up. For the most part, I only recall wearing well worn hand-me-down clothes by my older cousins which I loved very much.
   Start an exchange offer with family and friends. Share what you can. Keep them well and return them on time as promised.

2. Give yourself and others the gift of experiences. There are times when we are called to show our love by buying gifts.
   Choose to buy experiences they will enjoy rather than gifts they may delight in for a moment and then throw away.
   Last year my kids and little friends received cash for Christmas that they could save and use towards experiences. They chose to put it towards a ticket to visit a new place. The memories we made on the future trip were priceless and I was amazed at how confident kids felt in their ability to manage their money as well.

Last but not the least, start and end your day by steeping yourself in a grounded gratitude practice.
Appreciate all people, things, and experiences you ALREADY HAVE.
The more you embody the energy of sufficiency, fullness, and expansiveness the less you are tempted to move through life trying to fill a lack.
And the more joyful you feel.
The more you will have to give.
Your whole being will naturally overflow into the world being the gift that it is.

‘Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s needs, but not every man’s greed.’ — Mahatma Gandhi

Give yourself and Mother Nature this precious gift.

How are you feeling called to engage with the upcoming bLACK Friday Sale?
If this resonates and you see it as a divine opportunity, Friday is just 2 days away. Take these two days to reflect on what you are creating through this experience in this commitment.

If this was helpful, please share and do this with your friends and family.
I would love to hear about your experience.
Our collective intention holds much power to create the change we hope to see in the world. As Lynne Twist puts it beautifully, may we use all of life as an opportunity to awaken to our role as global citizens.
And that it will be so, as it is the natural outcome of an awakened consciousness.